Oh, SERIOUSLY!

I'm serious on this one! Child Protective Services should be knocking sometime this afternoon, around dinner time I should have all my children taken away due to NEGLECT! So we had the Gabe accident last month...then Eli hit his head on some rocks in our backyard last week. He came in crying, I set him on the couch with his blanket. Five minutes later he violently throws-up. Ten minutes later he is DEAD ASLEEP, at the point where I could not wake him up! He slept for an hour and a half, threw-up more. A half an hour later he was hungry, thirsty, and wanted to play outside! Ah...that would be a CONCUSSION! And then there was the incident TODAY! I had a doctor's appointment with the Urologist,(another story for another post) we were in the parking lot, walking in. Eli was walking on the curb like all kids do. I had just told him (perhaps jinxing him) not to walk on the curb because he would fall and get hurt. My children don't listen to me so, two seconds later, I see him hit the ground CHIN first! I rush back to pick him up and he has a gaping hole in his chin. Blood was everywhere! I looked like a horror film victim! I rushed him inside, (heels and a very heavy 3 year old do not make for graceful running) to find a bathroom. There was a lady far down a hall that I asked for help from. She took me into a dental office backroom where we put paper towels under his chin. Have I mentioned that I don't do well with stuff like this...due to great anxiety and not having a medical degree? I was pretty sure he would bleed to death! I got a hold of Mike, my "go-to-man" when I am in a state of panic, and I met him at our pediatrician's office. Dr. Lindgren was kind enough to quickly fit us in, I'm pretty sure they usually don't do stitches often. They would rather you go to the emergency room. So, 2 hours later and 5 stitches we are home! It is not even officially SUMMER and I know I can not handle the stress of more ACCIDENTS! Oh...wait...I won't have to...my children should be under the state's protection by 6:00 p.m.!
P.S. Did I happen to mention that Eli fell on the neighbor's stairs last fall...he hit his CHIN in the same place! That time it was only "glue stitches"...we are progressing!